Favorite Comedy Quotes
Emily: One time an assistant left the desk, because she, I don't know, sliced her hand open with a letter opener. Miranda missed Lagerfeld who had boarded a seventeen hour flight to Australia. She now works at TV Guide.
Andy Sachs: Man the desk at all times. Got it.
Marie: [to Ray and Harry] Why don't you both put your guns down, and go home?
Harry: Don't be stupid. This is the shootout.
(with wonder) Oh look, he's flying.Allen Gamble
He helped Joshua fight the battle of Jericho, he helped Daniel get out the lion's den, he helped Gilligan get off the island.Rev. Brown
Peter Gibbons: Um, the 7-Eleven, right? You take a penny from the tray.
Joanna: From the crippled children?
Peter Gibbons: No, that's the jar. I'm talking about the tray, the pennies for everybody. We're basically doing the same thing only we take it from a much bigger tray and we do it a couple of million times.
Mark: Why'd you scratch his C D?
Steve Barker: Jeffy just admiring it.
Mark: Do it again and you'll be admiring my butt from the pavement with a straw.
Steve Barker: ... What?
Mark: You heard me!
Andy Sachs: I thought only the first assistant went to the benefit
Miranda Priestly: Only when the first assistant hasn't decided to become an incubus of viral plague.
I'm sorry, do you have some prior commitment? Some hideous skirt convention you have to go to?Emily
Peter Gibbons: Look, I don't know about you guys, but I'm tired of being pushed around. Aren't you?
Samir: Yes, Peter, but I'm not going to do anything illegal.
Peter Gibbons: Samir, this is America.
King Jaffe Joffer: Time does fly fast, my son. It seems only yesterday I ordered your first diaper changed. Now you're a man about to be married. She will give you much pleasure, don't you think?
Prince Akeem: I'm not sure if I'm ready.
King Jaffe Joffer: Son, I know we never talked about this. I always assumed you had sex with your bathers. I know I do.
Jocelyn: [at a board meeting over the April issue] Well... they're showing a lot of florals right now, so I was thinking...
Miranda Priestly: Florals? For spring? Ground breaking.
Well, it's Groundhog Day... again... and that must mean we're up here at Gobbler's Knob waiting for the forecast from the world's most famous groundhog weatherman, Punxsutawney Phil, who's just about to tell us how much more winter we can expect.Phil