Favorite Comedy Quotes
Slapping the bass! Slappa da bass! Slappa da bass mon! Slappa de bass mon!Peter Klaven
You're gonna die, clown.Happy Gilmore
Pardon my French, but Cameron is so tight that if you stuck a lump of coal up his ass, in two weeks you'd have a diamond.Ferris Bueller
So long, gay boys!Mr. Chow
[about Gloria] She took me below deck for forty-five minutes. I have no bodily fluids left in me.Jeremy Grey
It would be so cool if I could breast-feed.Alan Garner
Will Turner: And then I intend to return here to marry you.
Elizabeth Swann: Properly?
Will Turner: Eagerly, if you'll still have me.
Elizabeth Swann: If it weren't for these bars, I'd have you already.
Jack Sparrow: How are we going?
Gibbs: Including those four? That gives us... four.
[Looking at a suspicious-looking passerby]
Nicholas Angel: All right, what about this guy? Ask yourself, why has he got his hat pulled down like that?
Danny Butterman: He's fuck-ugly.
Nicholas Angel: Or, he doesn't want you to see his face.
Danny Butterman: Yeah, it's 'cause he's fuck-ugly.
Saul: Sick! You threw up in my printer!
Dale Denton: I did.
Saul: You break it?
Dale Denton: I hope not.
We're going streaking.Frank
I Want To Tickle Your Belly Button... From The Inside.Nick Twisp and Francois Dillinger