Favorite Comedy Quotes
[giggling] My avitar's dressed like a hooker!Kate Holbrook
This is a... fuck!Samir
Becca: [drunkenly making out with Evan] I *so* flirt with you in math.
Evan: Tell me about it. I - same-sies.
Olive: Mom? Dad?
Richard: [1/2 asleep] What is it?
Olive: Grandpa won't wake up.
[narrating] Finally, Girl World was at peace. And if any freshmen tried to disturb that peace, well, let's just say we knew how to take care of it... Just kidding.Cady
Michael: Alright. Uh, I talked to her; I got the scoop.
Cameron: What'd she say?
Michael: "Hates him with the fire of a thousand suns." That's a direct quote.
Patrick: Thanks Michael. That's very comforting of you.
Peter Gibbons: What if we're still doin' this when we're 50?
Samir: It would be nice to have that kind of job security.
Peter Gibbons: Lumbergh's gonna have me work on Saturday. I can tell already. I'm gonna end up doin' it, because, uh... because I'm a big pussy... which is why I work at Initech to begin with.
Michael Bolton: Uh, yeah, well, I work at Initech and I don't consider myself a pussy, OK?
Samir: Yes, I am also not a pussy.
Regina: Oh my God, I love your skirt! Where did you get it?
Lea Edwards: It was my mom's in the '80s.
Regina: Vintage, so adorable.
Lea Edwards: Thanks!
Regina: That is the ugliest f-ing skirt I've ever seen.
I'm a sophisticated sex robot, sent back in time to change the future for one lucky lady.Chuck Sherman
Patrick: Well maybe you're not afraid of me but I'm sure you've thought about me naked, huh?
Kat Stratford: [sarcastically] Am I that transparent? I want you, I *need* you, oh baby, oh baby.
Do you think there's a chance your mom won't love you anymore when she sees how badly you're getting beaten right now?Gary
[giving an interview] Thank you, Doug. You know, I saw Doug playing yesterday. And I've got to tell you, this guy spends more time on the sand than David Hasselhoff.Shooter McGavin