Favorite Comedy Quotes
Brian: You don't need to put your P in a V right now.
Peter Bretter: No, I need to B my L on someone's T's.
Jim that pan lid is see clear.Selena
I'm going to suck your dick like I'm mad at it.Elizabeth Halsey
I pledge allegiance... to the band... of Mr. Schneebly... and will not fight him... for creative control... and will defer to him on all issues related to the musical direction of the band.Dewey Finn
Prince Humperdinck: I think your bluffing.
Westley: It's possible, Pig, I might be bluffing. It's conceivable, you miserable, vomitous mass, that I'm only lying here because I lack the strength to stand. But, then again... perhaps I have the strength after all.
Dionne: Hello? There was a stop sign.
Cher: I totally paused.
Danny: Pick us up in two hours.
Ronnie: Fuck you, Miss Daisy.
[In the wedding]
Alan Garner: How's my hair?
Stu Price: That's good.
Alan Garner: It's cool like Phil's?
Stu Price: It's classic Phil.
Lloyd: I'll bet you twenty dollars I can get you gambling before the day is out!
Lloyd: I'll give you three to one odds.
Lloyd: Five to one.
Lloyd: Ten to one?
Harry: You're on!
Lloyd: I'm gonna get ya!
Harry: Nu uh!
Lloyd: I don't know how but I'm gonna get ya.
Personally, I liked the university. They gave us money and facilities, we didn't have to produce anything! You've never been out of college! You don't know what it's like out there! I've *worked* in the private sector. They expect *results*.Dr Ray Stantz
Kenny: I love horses.
Cop: I love horses.
Kenny: I love Butterstuff.
[speaking to the priest] This girl's fit for a strait-jacket. I mean she's fucked three ways to the weekend. But you know what, Father? I dig it!Jeremy Grey