Rick: How about her?
Coakley: No, the tall blonde surrounds herself with a less attractive women to make herself look good.
Rick: Really?
Coakley: [as he moves his hands] Check this out. Hot, not.
Rick: That's awesome. You're like A Beautiful Mind.

Gingerbread Man: All right. Do you know... the muffin man?
Lord Farquaad: The muffin man?
Gingerbread Man: The muffin man.
Lord Farquaad: Yes, I know the muffin man. Who lives on Drury Lane?
Gingerbread Man: She's married to the muffin man...
Lord Farquaad: The muffin man?
Gingerbread Man: The muffin man.
Lord Farquaad: She's married to the muffin man.

Listen, not a year goes by, not a year, that I don't hear about some escalator accident involving some bastard kid which could have easily been avoided had some parent - I don't care which one - but some parent conditioned him to fear and respect that escalator.

Brodie

Chon Wang: What happened my horse? Is he dead?
Roy O'Bannon: No, but we are, Chon.

Ever fired your gun in the air and yelled, 'Aaaaaaah?'

Danny Butterman

What in the world?

Pageant Official Jenkins

You got knocked the fuck out... gimme my goddamn money... yeah payback's a motherfucker, Nigga.

Smokey

Steve Stifler: You actually said that?
Chris "Oz" Ostreicher: Shut up!
Jim: You did better than me, Nova.
Chris "Oz" Ostreicher: Don't call me that any more. I'm a fraud.

Aldous Snow: We're gonna fuck these two girls.
Aaron Green: I just got out of a relationship.
Aldous Snow: Was your ex a blonde or brunette?
Aaron Green: Brunette.
Aldous Snow: Blonde it is.

Aaron Green: If the party sucked, just say it. You don't have to lie.
Matty: You missed an awesome party.

Rick Vaughn: Fuck you.
Roger Dorn: What's the matter, rookie Fuck-Wad? Can't you take a little joke?
Rick Vaughn: Real fucking funny, asshole.
Lou Brown: All right, all right. Knock that shit off.
Roger Dorn: Lou, you better make it real clear to this little lady that I'm not about to take his shit.
Lou Brown: Shut up, Dorn.

My dream was to help my hometown, a small island hidden under the A in Atlantic, called Swallow Falls. We were one of the leading exporters of sardines, until the day Baby Brent Sardine cannery closed when everyone realized that sardines... are super gross. So everyone was stuck eating all the sardines that nobody wanted. Frozen, boiled, dried, fried, candied and juiced. Life was gray and flavorless, but when things seem hopeless, I stared down at defeat, and found hope.

Flint Lockwood

FREE Movie Newsletter