Favorite Comedy Quotes
Woody: [yelling through the heat duct] Buzz, help.
Stinky Pete the Prospector: It's too late, Woody. That silly old Buzz Lightweight can't help.
Woody: His name is Buzz Lightyear.
Stinky Pete the Prospector: Whatever. I always hated those upstart space toys.
You totally killed us, you evil metal dickweeds!Bill
Bill: Hey Ted? Wanna play 20 questions?
Ted: Okay! I got one!
Bill: Is it a mineral?
Bill: Are you a tank?
Ted: Whoa! Yeah!
So... you guys wanna make out or what?Doug Butabi
A poacher who shoots at rabbits may scare big game away.Lawrence Jamieson
This entire jungle is a house of death!Horton
Fellas, last year I made 3 million dollars, but your 50 thousand was the most fun. Are you ready? Then let's go get 'em.Janet Colgate
[reaches out to catch some rainwater in a water gourd in the treehouse that serves as his residence] Sure-fire remedy - learned it from an old medicine man... works every time.Big Z
You wouldn't believe the amount of migraine medication I'm on..Mikey Abromowitz
The stress is killing me.Mikey Abromowitz
Lani Aliikai: [Cody and Lani wash off under a waterfall] Can I ask you something personal?
Cody Maverick: Lani, we're in the shower! Ask me whatever you want.
You got to be a stupid motherfucker to get fired on your day off.Smokey