Favorite Comedy Quotes
This place is dead anyways.Charles
Patches O'Houlihan: If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball.
Guy Fleegman: Hey guys, there's a red-thingy moving toward the green-thingy.
Jason Nesmith: What?
Guy Fleegman: Red-thingy moving toward the green-thingy. I think we're the green-thingy.
You scurvy shiester bastard. I'm a doctor of journalism man! Get in there and clean your shorts! Clean your shorts goddammit like a big boy!Raoul Duke
Oh, the anger sharks are swimming in my head!Nate
People say, You must have been the class clown. And I say, No, I wasn't. But I sat next to the class clown, and I studied him.Dr. Pearl
Death is but a doorway, time is but a window, I'll be back.Vigo
Chon Wang: See! I told you so!
Roy O'Bannon: No, you said "wet shirt don't break," not "piss shirt bend bar"!
It is of no consequence to me.King Jaffe Joffer
The pen is blue, the pen is blue, the goddamn pen is blue!Fletcher
It looks like we're up chocolate creek without a Popsicle stick!Gingerbread Man
You know my girlfriend is dead. She fell off a cliff and died on impact.Happy Gilmore