Favorite Comedy Quotes
[looking at another toy of himself] Am I really that fat?Buzz Lightyear
Peter's another name for weaner.Steve Barker
Was it morally wrong to exploit our knowledge of the future for personal financial gain? That hot tub time machine turned us into kings!Lou
The problem is every time I try to get close to somebody it's like there's something out there that just says oh Tibby's about to be happy, better get her.Tibby
Well, what if there is no tomorrow? There wasn't one today.Phil
[to Steve] I don't care if you leave this second!Laurie Henderson
Venetia: Oh no, she didn't?
Sissy: Oh yes she did!
Venetia: [commenting on Ling-Ling's hot outfit] Girlfriend's booty be all wrapped up in licious!
Sissy: All wrapped up.
Ling Ling: You're pretty dope and phat yourselves
I'm Irish! This is milk to me baby! Milk!Father Brian Finn
Larry Buckman: Is that Grandma?
Frank: Yeah, she's still alive.
Larry Buckman: Jeez Grandma, you got short.
Grandma: I'm shrinking!
Larry Buckman: Bummer!
[makes out with Danielle]
Inigo Montoya: Excuse... Excuse me... Excuse me... Fezzik, please?
Fezzik: EVERYBODY... MOVE! [everybody parts, path is clear]
Inigo Montoya: Thank you.
Would you look at that body language? Legs crossed towards each other. That is an unequivocal sex invite.Cher