Favorite Comedy Quotes
Jack: This chick Stephanie, she's got it all goin' on.
Miles Raymond: Well, she is cute, yeah.
Jack: Cute? She's a fuckin' hottie. And you almost tell her that I'm gettin' married? What's the matter with you?
Mr. Ryan: Who was Joan of Arc?
Bill: Noah's wife?
Well, that's the thing about life, is the surprises, the little things that sneak up on you and grab hold of you.George
Hey, can I get another drink down here?Willie
Austin Powers, International Man of Mystery, was frozen in 1967 and defrosted in the Nineties to battle his nemesis, Dr. Evil. After foiling his archenemy's plan to send a nuclear warhead to the center of the earth, Austin banished Dr. Evil to the cold recesses of space and settled down with his new wife, Vanessa, to live happily ever after. Or so he thought...Narrator
[to bartender] You're going to be embarrassed when you realize I'm Wilmer Valderrama.Ben Stone
Teddy Sanders: You make the store more approachable.
Mac Radner: Like, I'm more of an attainable goal?
Teddy Sanders: Yeah, you're like Relaxed Fit.
Have you been shootin' up Rogaine?Rita
Wanda: What are you thinking, Archie?
Archie: I'm just trying to think of one good reason why I should take you to South America with me.
Wanda: How about... because I have the key to the safety deposit box?
Archie: That's a...
Wanda, Archie: ...good reason.
Ron Albertson: I'd wish they'd at least give us a line. I made some suggestions...
Sheila: We should be line-DANCING.
I'm not wearing any diamonds!Rick Riker
Steve Butabi: Oh my God, Doug. This is the most amazing place I've ever been.
Richard Grieco: Guys, guys. This is the coat room. The club's in here.