Favorite Comedy Quotes
Moe: Mind your P's and Q's!
Curly: Don't forget to dot the I's!
Everybody ready for a good time?
Moe
Ladies, until you understand the mindset of a man, you are never gonna win in the game of love.
Steve Harvey
Family Feud Steve Harvey, how could he throw us under the bus like that?!
Cedric
I don't know if we should be doing anything too official.
Evan
To Tom and Violet! (Raises a toast) One assumes that everything is going to turn out like some romantic comedy, but most engagements end up like Saving Private Ryan. Good luck. God knows you're going to need it.
Sylvia
Tom: We both know I deserve to get super laid for this.
Violet: Do you want me to wear a cape or something?
Tom: I want the show.
Violet: You get the Cirque du Soleil of shows...
Sylvia: Any ideas when this wedding might happen? Grandparents do have a tendency to die.
Violet: Mom, they're all right there.
Sylvia: Well, for now...
This is supposed to be exciting. This is your wedding. You only get a few of these.
Suzie Barnes-Eilhauer
Rabbi: Of course, the men will wear yarmulkes...
Tom: Definitely, I'll wear mine...
Violet: Babe, you don't have a yarmulke...
Tom: I have a whole...it's in my... my Jewish drawer.
Tom: You told me that it was gonna be two years. It's sort of like when you're on a treadmill, and you tell yourself "I want to run five miles today" and now, it's forever miles...
Violet: When was the last time you were on a treadmill? Sorry...
General Aladeen: Don't worry, I am Wadiya's number one actor. You don't win 4 Wadiyan Golden Globes for nothing.
Nadal: Yes you do, because you gave them to yourself!
