Harry: [after running into his ex-wife] She looked weird, didn't she? She looked really weird.
Sally: I don't know, I've never seen her before.
Harry: Trust me, she looked weird. Her legs looked heavy. Really, she must retaining water.
Sally: Harry.
Harry: Believe me, the woman saved everything.

Mr. Wolfe: I thought you'd left.
Curt Henderson: No, not yet. I have no matches.
Mr. Wolfe: That's all right.
[strikes a match and lights his cigarette]
Mr. Wolfe: Brother, how do I get stuck with dance supervision? Will you tell me that? You going back east? Boy, I remember the day I went off. Got drunk as hell the night before, just...
Curt Henderson: Blotto.
Mr. Wolfe: Blotto, exactly. Barfed on the train all the next day, too.
Curt Henderson: Cute, very cute. Where'd you go again?
Mr. Wolfe: Middlebury, Vermont.
Curt Henderson: Right.
Mr. Wolfe: Got a scholarship.
Curt Henderson: Only stayed a semester?
Mr. Wolfe: One semester. After all that, I came back here.
Curt Henderson: Why did you come back?
Mr. Wolfe: I decided I wasn't the competitive type.
Mr. Wolfe: I don't know, maybe I was scared.
Curt Henderson: Well, I uh - I think I may find that I'm not the competitive type myself.
Mr. Wolfe: What do you mean?
Curt Henderson: Well, I'm not really sure that I'm
Curt Henderson: going.
Mr. Wolfe: Hey now, don't be stupid. Experience life! Have some fun, Curt! Anyway, good luck.

Stacy Hamilton: I want a relationship. I want romance.
Linda Barrett: In Ridgemont? We can't even get cable TV here, Stacy, and you want romance.

Cody Maverick: [he and Big Z are hanging upside down] When do we begin training?
Big Z: What does it look like we're doing?
Cody Maverick: It looks like we're acting like a couple of fools.
Big Z: See? You're learning.

[lining up outside The Roxbury]
Doug Butabi: So... you want to dance?
Girl: We're not in the club yet.
Doug Butabi: Right.

Magda: What are you doing?
Magda's boyfriend: That's my girl he's kissing.
Magda: But you just slept with me.
Magda's boyfriend: I was only boning you to get to Mary.

This is why you are so nervous all the time. You have like chunks of roast beef in your heart!


T.S. Quint: But they're engaged.
Brodie: Doesn't matter, can't happen.
T.S. Quint: Why not? It's bound to come up.
Brodie: It's impossible, Lois could never have Superman's baby. Do you think her fallopian tubes could handle the sperm? I guarantee you he blows a load like a shotgun right through her back. What about her womb? Do you think it's strong enough to carry her child?
T.S. Quint: Sure, why not?
Brodie: He's an alien, for Christ sake. His Kyrptonian biological makeup is enhanced by earth's yellow sun. If Lois gets a tan the kid could kick right through her stomach. Only someone like Wonder Woman has a strong enough uterus to carry his kid. The only way he could bang regular chicks is with a kryptonite condom. That would kill him.
T.S. Quint: How is it that I go from the verge of hot Floridian sex with Brandi to man of steel coital debates with you in the food court?
Brodie: Cookie stand isn't part of the food court.
T.S. Quint: Of course it is.
Brodie: The food court is downstairs. The cookie stand is upstairs. It not like we're talking quantum physics here.
T.S. Quint: The cookie stands counts as an eatery, eateries are part of the food court.
Brodie: Bullshit. Eateries that operate within the designated square downstairs count as food court. Anything outside, of said designated sqaure, counts as an autonomous unit for mid-mall snacking. Now, if your going to wax intellectual about the subject...

Grace: I've got a very rare blood type. I'm AB positive.
Bruce: Well I'm IB positive. I be positive they ain't touching me with no needle.

Bo Peep: [amorously] You're cute when you care.
Woody: [embarrassed] Bo. Not in front of Buzz.

Oh, you are the loveliest girls that ever I set eyes on. Can you not get them married, Mrs. Dashwood?

Mrs Jennings

A black man would rather miss than look bad.

Billy Hoyle

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