Macaulay Connor: I don't think you're being fair to me, Mr. Kidd.
Sidney Kidd: No?
Macaulay Connor: No. You're treating me like you treat all your other writers.

Margaret Lord: Are you one of the musicians?
Macaulay Connor: No!
Margaret Lord: Oh of course, you're Junius's friend. Only you're not. Do you have any violin strings?
Macaulay Connor: [digs in his pocket] I have an aspirin. Will that work?
Margaret Lord: I don't think so! It's for a violin. Oh well, no matter!

Macaulay Connor: What's this? Is it my book?
C. K. Dexter Haven: Yes.
Macaulay Connor: C. K. Dexter Haven you have unsuspected depth!
C. K. Dexter Haven: Thanks, old chap.
Macaulay Connor: But have you read it?
C. K. Dexter Haven: When I was trying to stop drinking, I read anything.
Macaulay Connor: And did you stop drinking?
C. K. Dexter Haven: Yes. Your book didn't do it though.

Can we get through one fucking conversation without you reminding me that my goddamn husband's dead?

Tiffany

Tiffany: You love me?
Pat: Yeah.
Tiffany: Okay.

  • Permalink: Okay.
  • Rating: Unrated

You're not a standup guy today, Pat!

Tiffany

I don't have an iPod. I don't have a phone. They don't let me make calls. I'm going to call Nikki.

Pat

Mom, can we stop at the library? I want to read Nikki's entire high school syllabus.

Pat

Nikki's waiting for me to get in shape and get my life back together. Then we're going to be together.

Pat

Todd Cleary: We had a moment at the dinner table didn't we?
Jeremy Grey: No! No! We did not have a moment at the dinner table, Todd!

I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger.

Cal Naughton, Jr.

Oh Ron, there are literally thousands of other men that I should be with instead, but I am 72 percent sure that I love you.

Veronica Corningstone

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