Favorite Comedy Quotes
The mind plays tricks on you. You play tricks back! It's like you're unraveling a big cable-knit sweater that someone keeps knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting...Pee-wee
I know you are, but what am I?Pee-wee
Pee-wee: What did you do?
Mickey: Well, I lost my temper and I took a knife and I uh-. Do you know those "Do Not Remove Under the Penalty of Law" labels they put on mattresses?
Mickey: Well I CUT one of them off!
Mickey: Yeah, I have a real bad temper.
Pee-wee: Boy, I always thought that was the dumbest law.
Dottie: Pee-wee, how are you ever going to pay a reward like that?
Pee-wee: It's simple. Whoever returns the bike is obviously the person who stole it. So they don't deserve any reward!
[falls off bike after attempting tricks] I meant to do that.Pee-wee
Look out, Mister Potato Head!Pee-wee
Pee-wee: How do ya like school, Billy?
This is one of my personal favorite parts of the tour. Please say hello to our residents, Pedro and his wife Inez. Inez is holding a clay pot that she seems very proud of. She has carefully detailed it with lots of paint and glaze. And Pedro is working on an "adobe." Can you say that with me? "Adobe".Tina
There's a lotta things about me you don't know anything about, Dottie. Things you wouldn't understand. Things you couldn't understand. Things you shouldn't understand.Pee-wee
Pee-wee: Life can be so unfair.
Mickey: You telling ME?
Is this something you'd like to share with the rest of us, Amazing Larry?Pee-wee
We're the law, bitch!Ryan