Favorite Comedy Quotes
That's not Yankee dancing - that's Devil Rays dancin'!Ben
Robin: He's offering Ben $125,000 for his Red Sox tickets.
Sarah: Are you really that rich?
Sarah: Then why don't you dress better?
Lindsey Meeks: You don't see us tangled up in the sheets with the Eiffel Tower in the background. You see the Mariners are coming in, and Pedro's pitching Friday.
Ben: No, on Saturday. Schilling's Friday.
Ben: You're gonna get arrested!
Lindsey Meeks: You can't sell your tickets!
Ben: That's why you ran across the whole field? Wait, you've gotta tell me... was it spongy?
Lindsey Meeks: Wow, you have quite a little group here.
Ben: Well, it's my summer family.
Ben: This is odd, it never happened before.
Al: You're havin' a stroke. Good!
[helping sick Lindsay into pajamas] I won't look, I promise. Okay, I looked.Ben
Hey ump, get off your knees. You're blowing the game!Stephen King
At what point do you say to yourself, "I'm counting on you to be the one, and I have no fall back plan."Lindsey Meeks
...you do this thing... it's so cute I wanna kill myself.Ben
[to his friends on megaphone] Quick break, everybody. There's some nice Pakistani cold cuts there, courtesy of Mrs. Segal.Ben
Ben: You know what's really great about baseball?
Lindsey Meeks: Hmm?
Ben: You can't fake it. You know, anything else in life you don't have to be great in. Business, music, art. I mean you can get lucky.
Lindsey Meeks: Really?
Ben: Yeah, you can fool everyone for awhile, you know? It's like... not... not baseball. You either hit a curveball or you can't. That's the way it works.