Favorite Comedy Quotes
Deborah Clasky: Are you that much nicer than me?
John Clasky: You didn't set the bar that high.
John Clasky: Just do it or I'll light my hair on fire and start punching myself in the face!
[Walks away, reconsiders]
John Clasky: That probably wasn't the best way to get make myself clear, was it?
John Clasky: Think seriously about getting up. You don't have to get up right now, but are you thinking seriously about it?
Evelyn Wright: We have to talk.
Deborah Clasky: Mother, are you buzzed?
Evelyn Wright: No. I quit drinking weeks ago! No one noticed, but I guess that's a pretty good indicator that I conducted myself quite well when I was drunk. But this isn't about me right now.
Deborah Clasky: You were an alcoholic and wildly promiscuous woman during my formative years so that im in this fix because of you, it is your fault and I just needed that moment for us to build on.
Evelyn Wright: You have a solid point dear... but right now the lessons of my life are coming in handy for you.
Flor Moreno: It's something, watching you.
John Clasky: Well. Well, if it's anything on your end, imagine over here. Scratch that. The last thing you want to hear is someone going off on your looks.
Flor Moreno: Don't be crazy. Tell me EVERY detail.
John Clasky: Okay. Okay, I will.
Deborah Clasky: So tell me again why I can't call him on his cell again?
Evelyn Norwich: Besides that he turned it off?
Deborah Clasky: Yeah.
Evelyn Norwich: Forty messages starts to look needy.
Deborah Clasky: You don't have any other questions for me?
John Clasky: What other questions could there be?
Is what you want for yourself to become someone very different than me?Flor Moreno
Deborah Clasky: Do you really think that cupping my breast is going to solve the issue here?
John Clasky: It's worked before.
Deborah Clasky: Well, now it's infuriating me.
John Clasky: Wrong breast.
[upon first seeing Cristina] Flor! Look at this child! You could make a fortune doing surrogate pregnancy!Deborah Clasky
Deborah Clasky: [upon hearing John's car pull into the driveway] Do I need to put on make-up?
Evelyn Norwich: You need a hose, but we don't have that kinda time.