Favorite Comedy Quotes
[to John Clasky] There are some mistakes you cannot risk when you have children.Flor Moreno
Deborah Clasky: [upon hearing John's car pull into the driveway] Do I need to put on make-up?
Evelyn Norwich: You need a hose, but we don't have that kinda time.
[after hearing that his wife's been cheating on him] I couldn't hear you. There was a crack in the planet. WOW... that was noisy!John Clasky
Flor Moreno: I, uh... don't think you should either.
John Clasky: Then excuse me, because if I had the equipment I'd inject the vodka.
Willie Bank: This town might have changed, but not me. I know people highly invested in my survival, and they are people who really know how to hurt in ways you can't even imagine.
Danny Ocean: Well, I know all the guys that you'd hire to come after me, and they like me better than you.
Reuben Tishkoff: So... where's the partner's desk gonna be?
Willie Banks: Oh, there is no partner's desk, Reuben. You're out.
Reuben Tishkoff: What? Are you gonna throw me off the roof?
Willie Banks: Well, I don't want to.
Emmett: You fall asleep during the West Wing.
Elle: Yeah, but have you seen what they're wearing?
Elle: Hello, Patriots! I don't think I've been this excited since Gucci became a publicly-traded company.
Timothy McGinn: Oh my God, it's capital Barbie.
Reena: She's so... shiny.
Congresswoman: You have the full support of the Sunshine State!
Paulette: Yay for Ohio!
Who's ready to discharge?Paulette
Ooh... the bend and snap! I did that last night naked. I broke a window though.Paulette
Snaps for Congresswoman Hauser!Rep. Rudd