Favorite Comedy Quotes
[upon waking up after the first night of training, next to a deer he killed with his teet] Oh no, not again!Barry Badrinath
I always sleep better with a little sausage in me.Great Gam Gam
Todd Wolfhouse: We've got to go back and get grandpa's ashes.
Jan Wolfhouse: You go, I'm never leaving this place.
I'll show you how to chug a beer, mother fucker!Steve "Fink" Finklestein
Steve "Fink" Finklestein: Come on, guys. I'm a respected member of the scientific community. I've been published in four journals.
Landfill: Which one? Toad Load Weekly?
Barry Badrinath: [about the past] Come on, buddy. Can we bury the hatchet? I mean, we both know your wife just sat there taking it like a plastic fuck doll.
Todd Wolfhouse: I happened to MARRY that plastic fuck doll!
I'm just lookin' for a little slap and pickle!Barry Badrinath
Yeah, you Americans, why don't you go back to strip malls und drink your Zimas and Smirnoff Ices!Otto
Jan Wolfhouse: [after trying the beer] What's wrong?
Todd Wolfhouse: This means Great Gam Gam really was a whore.
Jan Wolfhouse: [thinks about it for a second, then runs off with his ears covererd] LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA...
Look at the size of that graduated cylinder!Steve "Fink" Finklestein
[to Germans during a beer pong match] Loser takes a paddle up the ass.Todd Wolfhouse
Oh that's rich! I've got a cowboy on one side and an Indian on the other! It's like the wild west!Steve "Fink" Finklestein