Favorite Comedy Quotes
Therapist: We have some new-comers here today. Please say hello to Scott and his father Mr... Ev-ille?
Dr. Evil: Evil, Actually, Dr. Evil.
The Group: Hello, Scott. Hello, Dr. Evil.
Scott Evil: Hi, everybody.
Come on, grab some sky.Gary
I forgive you. I only hope my neurologist will feel the same.Chip Douglas
This looks kinda... precarious. Well nothing to worry, obviously when they build a bridge like this they take into account that elephants will be crossing here.Horton
Brodie: Look, if I had any kind of glow it's because I just got laid. I would look the same had I banged anyone in that elevator... present company excluded.
T.S. Quint: Deny it all you want. I think that you're too proud to admit that you want her back.
Brodie: I suddenly want something very bad to happen to you.
[TS elbows Gwen in the chest, she hits him in the groin]
Brodie: See, that's what you get for fucking with me.
Ooh, a cottage! How charming. A little cottage is always very snug.Fanny
Harry, you're going to have to try and find a way of not expressing every feeling that you have, every moment that you have them.Sally Albright
Quentin Hapsburg: I don't recall your name on the guest list.
Lt. Frank Drebin: That's OK. I sometimes go by my maiden name.
Mom. You're so fifties.Tracy Turnblad
Rosemary Cross: How did I hurt your feelings?
Max Fischer: Oh, my God! I wrote a hit play!
John Clasky: Just do it or I'll light my hair on fire and start punching myself in the face!
[Walks away, reconsiders]
John Clasky: That probably wasn't the best way to get make myself clear, was it?
Carrie Bradshaw: Lets go down to the hotel for dinner tonight, I need to get myself out of my mexacoma.
Samantha Jones: Aww, you made a little joke. Good for you!