Favorite Comedy Quotes
Veronica Sawyer: Watch it Heather, you might be digesting food there.
Heather McNamara: Yeah, where's your urge to purge?
Heather Duke: Fuck it.
Now I've seen a lot of bullshit... angel dust, switchblades, sexually perverse photography involving tennis rackets...Principal
Transfer to Washington. Transfer to Jefferson. No one at Westerberg is going to let you play their reindeer games.Heather Chandler
People will look at the ashes of Westerburg and say, "Now there's a school that self-destructed, not because society didn't care, but because the school was society." Now that's deep.J.D.
Chaos was what killed the dinosaurs, darlingJ.D.
It's one thing to want someone out of your life, but it's another thing to serve them a wake-up cup full of liquid drainer.Veronica Sawyer
Kurt Kelly: Hey Ram, doesn't this cafeteria have a no fags allowed rule?
J.D.: Well, they seem to have an open door policy for assholes though don't they?
What is your damage, Heather?Veronica Sawyer
You blow it tonight, girl, and it's keggers with kids all next year.Heather Chandler
Grow up Heather, bulimia's so '87.Heather Chandler
Veronica, why are you pulling my dick?Heather Duke
J.D.: Is your life perfect?
Veronica Sawyer: I'm on my way to a party at Remington University... No, my life's not perfect. I don't really like my friends.
J.D.: I... I don't really like your friends either.
Veronica Sawyer: Well, it's just like - they're people I work with, and our job is being popular and shit.
J.D.: Maybe it's time to take a vacation.