Favorite Comedy Quotes
But this isn't a foxhole. It's a Porsche.Alex Foreman
Dan Foreman: You're pregnant? Holy crap! Does it feel like a boy?
Ann Foreman: Right now it feels like the stomach flu.
Ann Foreman: I'm pregnant!
Dan Foreman: What? I'm sorry, I thought you just said that you were pregnant.
Ann Foreman: Yeah.
Dan Foreman: You can't be pregnant.
Ann Foreman: Yeah I can, I am
Dan Foreman: Yeah, how could that happen?
Ann Foreman: Well I think that you were there too.
Dan Foreman: This is fine, this is fine. That means, when he's 21, ill be... 72.
Ann Foreman: 73.
Dan Foreman: 72.
Ann Foreman: 73.
Dan Foreman: Holy crap.
You seem jumpy, Carter... did you switch from mocha to crack?Dan Foreman
Alex Foreman: You're kind of a bizarrely honest guy, huh?
Carter Duryea: No, just around you.
Alex Foreman: [laughs while kissing Carter]
Carter Duryea: What?
Alex Foreman: Oh, nothing, I was just thinking about how my dad said he wired this place with video surveillance.
Carter Duryea: Yeah, that's hilarious.
Carter Duryea: I'm gonna have to let some people go.
Dan Foreman: Why do you say let them go? They don't WANT to go. Why don't you just say fire them?
Carter Duryea: Because it sounds better.
Dan Foreman: Not to the person getting fired it doesn't.
I'll drop kick you across the restaurant.Dan Foreman
For what it's worth, I enjoy talking to you more than anyone else.Carter Duryea
[on phone] Hello. Dan! Hey. Oh, my God. Congratulations. lt's amazing. Do you have a name yet? Oh, no, that's terrific. Uh, probably because l'm jogging. No, l'm outside. Yes. l'm actually jogging outside. Please Playa del Rey. Don't laugh. I'm thinking about getting into...Carter Duryea
Toula Portokalos: What happened? Biker fight? nose job? What?
Ian Miller: Uh... yeah.
Toula Portokalos: No, really.
Ian Miller: You don't want to know.
Toula Portokalos: Oh I don't know. If I had survived an old lady ass-kicking I would want to brag about it.