[after learning from an investigator that Margot had been previously married and has had affairs with both men and women] So, she smokes.

Raleigh

I didn't think so much of him at first. But now I get it, he's everything that I'm not.

Royal

Richie: I wrote a suicide note.
Chas: You did?
Richie: Yeah, right after I regained consciousness.

Hell of a damn grave. Wish it were mine.

Royal

[Telling everybody that Royal doesn't have cancer] I know what stomach cancer looks like. I've seen it, and you don't eat three cheeseburgers a day with french fries when you got it.

Henry Sherman

Chas: Are you okay?
Royal: Fuck do you care?

[after he faked a terminal illness, took residence in the house under false pretenses, tried to instigate a fight with his estranged wife's fiancé, lied to his family and was found out] I know I'm going to be the bad guy here...

Royal

Steve Zissou: We'll split into two groups. I'll take Ned, Ogata, and Wolodarsky.
Klaus Daimler: Thanks. Thanks a lot for not picking me.

Festival Director: [translating] That's an endangered species at most. What would be the scientific purpose of killing it?
Steve Zissou: Revenge.

I'm going to find it and I'm going to destroy it. I don't know how yet. Possibly with dynamite.

Steve Zissou

Who the shit is Kingsley Zissou?

Klaus Daimler

Don't point that gun at him, he's an unpaid intern.

Steve Zissou

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