Favorite Comedy Quotes
Templeton: You're a pig! Pig equals slop. The rat is happy!
Wilbur: My name's Wilbur! Do you have a name or is it just 'The Rat'?
Templeton: Did you say 'just the rat'? For your information, pig: The rat rules! We were here long before your kind and we'll be here long after. So, you just keep that in mind next time you feel like reducing me to just 'the rat'.
Wilbur: You called yourself 'The Rat'.
Templeton: I can call me that. You can't.
Ulysses Everett McGill: Ain't you gonna introduce us, Pete?
Pete: I don't know their names. I seen 'em first!
George: Drive carefully. And don't forget to fasten your condom.
George: [shrieks in embarrassment] Seat belt! I meant, I meant seat belt.
Earl Bassett: Stupid son-of-a-bitch, knocked itself cold!
Valentine McKee: Cold, my ass, he's dead! We killed it. We killed it! Fuck you!
Hey, dude, you really shouldn't drink and horse.Edward
Karen: I happen to LIKE the roller coaster, okay? As far as I'm concerned, your grandmother is brilliant.
Gil: Yeah if she's so brilliant why is she sitting in our NEIGHBOR'S CAR?
Dusty Bottoms: Time for plan B. Plan A was to break into El Guapo's fortress.
Carmen: And that you have done, now what?
Dusty Bottoms: Well we really dont have a plan B. We didn't expect for the first plan to work. Sometimes you can overplan these things.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: The day before the murder, you were seen hitting the victim and saying... what?
Ponton: 'I am going to kill you, I am going to kill you'
Look at this, okay? I want you to remember this face. This is the guy behind the guy behind the guy.Trent
Marin: We know this about me. I'm just not cut out for this kind of drama.
Erica Barry: I think it's the drama in life that makes you strong.
Marin: You always say things like that!
I'll drop kick you across the restaurant.Dan Foreman
I was never a member of the Nazi Party! I only followed orders. I had nothing to do with the war! I didn't even know there was a war. We lived at the back, near Switzerland. All we heard was yodelling... yoodle le he hoo! Hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo, Yodelay, Yodelay, Yodelay-WHO ARE YOU!?!Franz Liebkind