Popular Comedy Quotes
Agent 23: If you don't follow the rules here then what are we?
The Chief: I'm telling you what we're not, we're not people who jam staples into other people's heads, that's CIA crap!
I was trying to help you, bitch!Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Cousin Eddie: I don't know why they call this stuff hamburger helper. It does just fine by itself, huh? I like it better than tuna helper myself, don't you, Clark?
Clark: You're the gourmet around here, Eddie.
Ha ha ha, WIPE OUT!Big Z
If you want information from Lula, you goin' have to bring her a snack.Lula
He's teaching me to change my instincts... or at least ignore them.Sheila
George: What's the matter with you, then?
Ringo: It's his grandfather. I can tell he doesn't like me. It's cause I'm little.
George: Ah, you've got an inferiority complex, you have.
Ringo: Yeah, I know, that's why I play the drums - it's me active compensatory factor.
Randal Graves: Ladies and gentlemen, and you, Elias! Straight from the debauchery capital of the world, TI-juana Mexico!
Dante Hicks: Oh, God, no.
Randal Graves: Oh, God, yes!
Sam Eagle: CIA!
Jean Pierre Napoleon: Interpol!
Sam Eagle: This is my travel badge, here's my real badge!
Jean Pierre Napoleon: You must have been looking at the wrong badge!
Sam Eagle: You were saying?
There was a guy in the bathroom - and he was really hot!Maxwell Smart
Julianne Potter: It is the duty of the best man to dance with the maid of honor.
Michael O'Neill: Dance? You can't dance. When did you learn how to dance?
Julianne Potter: I've got moves you've never seen.
Westley: Why can't I move? Why am I up against this wall?
Fezzik: You've been mostly dead all day!