Gordon, when you tell this story to your grandkids, you be sure to leave this part out.

Capt. James West

Don't worry, it could be worse - he could be a white guy.

Medicine Man

Well, we're waiting!

Judge Smails

I love watching your ass when you walk. Is that beautiful or what? Don't go near him, he's mine.


I'm not gonna lose my son!


Kevin: Jane, can I have $50?
Jane: No.
Kevin: Jane, can I have $50?
Jane: No.
Kevin: [takes hand lovingly] Jane, I REALLY need $50, can i have the $50?
Jane: [hesitant] ... No?
Kevin: [laughing] See? That was good!
[grabs Jane's drink]
Kevin: Jane, can I have your drink?
Jane: Sure.

Well, if it ain't Mr. "Big-in-the-Britches", himself!


Percy: Where are we?
Inez: This is Little Havana.
Percy: Like in Grand Theft Auto?

Beanie: Spanish what the hell are you doing?
Spanish: I'm just going to get some water. This suit is crazy hot, yo.
Beanie: Put your head back on. That can be very traumatic for the kids.
Spanish: You're right, I'm sorry, sir.
Beanie: Don't sorry me, babe. And shake the tail when you walk. You're better than that.

Helen: Oh my God, you got food poisoining from that restaurant, didn't you.
Annie: No, I had the same thing that she had and I feel fine.
[As Becca starts to feel sick and attempts to control pucking]

Don't worry Bob I'll get her. And her little dog too.

Rep. Rudd

Father Ritley: Body of Christ.
Evian Graham: Are these non-fat?

FREE Movie Newsletter