Lester Bangs: They make you feel cool. And hey. I met you. You are not cool.
William Miller: I know. Even when I thought I was, I knew I wasn't.

Never in my wildest imagination did I ever dream I would have sons like these.

Herman Blume

You wanna talk some jive? I'll talk some jive. I'll talk some jive like you've never heard!

Royal

Darren: You're a lot stronger then you were in high school.
Sandy: Yeah, well, the convent's got a great gym.

Chazz: Personal philosophy: Clothing optional.

You are total catch. Any guy would by psyched to be your man. You should just make room for someone who is nice to you.

Lillian

Nigel Powers: [rubs throat] Ow...
Austin Powers: What's wrong with your neck?
Nigel Powers: I took a Viagra, got stuck in me throat, I've had a stiff neck for hours.
Austin Powers: I thank you!

I am so excited to see those little Fockers!

Pam Byrnes

Droz: Hi, is Sam in there?
Womynist #1: "In there" ... What the hell's that supposed to mean?
Womynist #2: Yeah, cock-man-oppressor!
Droz: Why, thank you. Could you just tell her that Mr. Pokey stopped by.

We're going streaking.

Frank

Vincent Benedict: [impressed with Julius's fighting abilities] You could be a boxer or something. I could be your manager.
Julius Benedict: No, I could never fight for money.
Vincent Benedict: Well that's fine. You fight, I'll keep the money.

You know what the trouble about real life is? There's no danger music.

Chip Douglas

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