Popular Comedy Quotes
It's a glow-in-the-dark compass ring. So you don't get lost.Josh
Oseary Drakoulias: You must swear, legally swear that you will not kill that shark, or whatever it is, if it actually exists.
Steve Zissou: I'm going to fight it, but I'll let it live. What about my dynamite?
Oseary Drakoulias: [to assistant] Phillip, dynamite.
We're up the creek and you want to hock the paddle!Jerry
[as Peter leaves to confess to Lumbergh] Peter... watch out for your cornhole, man.Lawrence
Jane: Oh yeah, I'm a real good caulker.
Kevin: [into recorder] Likes caulk.
Time to nut up or shut up!Tallahassee
Evan: Yeah chicks go nuts for that... the male camel toe.
Seth: Yea yea! The camel tail.
Yeah! The attitude dictates that you don't care whether she comes, stays, lays, or prays. I mean whatever happens, your toes are still tappin'. Now when you got that, then you have the attitude.Mike Damone
Annie Hall: So I told her about, about the family and about my feelings towards men and about my relationship with my brother. And then she mentioned penis envy. Do you know about that?
Alvy Singer: Me? I'm, I'm one of the few males who suffers from that.
He sets the standard for "Not to be fucked with."Columbus
[to Shrek as the ship leaves] Well my friend, you are royally...Puss in Boots