Popular Comedy Quotes
Beautiful Aurelia, I've come here with a view of asking you to marriage me. I know I seems an insane person - because I hardly knows you - but sometimes things are so transparency, they don't need evidential proof. And I will inhabit here, or you can inhabit with me in England.Jamie
Olive: Do you eat ice cream?
Miss California: Yes. My favorite is Cherry Chocolate Garcia... except technically I think it's a frozen yogurt.
Kate Holbrook: What you eat, the baby eats. What you listen to, the baby listens to.
Oscar: If you listen to DMX, the baby comes out goin' "Ennngghhh!"
Prime Minister: I'm very jealous of your plane, by the way.
The President: We love that old thing.
Doug Madsen: Did he just say "cracker"?
Dudley Frank: "Cracker-ass."
Doug Madsen: Oh, perfect.
Listen to me, I'm gonna' tell you something. I know some sick people in my life, this guy is the craziest, wildest bastard I ever met in my life!Eddie Palermo
Well, everyone at work went to TGI Fridays, but I don't really like that place. Or anyone that I work with.Kit
Eva: I know New York is a great city, but I do not miss that lifestyle at all. I mean it was just stress, and Blackberries, and sleeping pills. I used to drink a triple latte every morning just to wake up.
Linda: Well, I see your point, but I kind of value the sleeping pill and the Blackberry and the latte.
Seth: You know you can really get trapped in that web of beepers and Zenith televisions and Walkmens and Discmans and floppy discs and zip drives, laser discs, answering machines and Nintendo Power Glove...
Linda: Wow, you know so much about technology.
Dr. Mainheimer: You're thinking about him again, aren't you? What was his name? Frank?
Jane Spencer: Yes.
Dr. Mainheimer: You just can't forget him, can you?
Jane Spencer: Who?
Dr. Mainheimer: Frank!
Preston: Hey, I've got one for ya. Remember that time when I was about to talk to that beautiful girl, and you came up to me and started telling me all these asinine stories? Remember that, huh?
Random Guy: No.
Preston: Gee, that's funny. Because it just happened!
Oh ... my ... God.Dean Vernon Wormer
Carter Duryea: [Alex dims the lights, turns on soft music, and lights incense] Well, it looks like everything is perfect.
Alex Foreman: So why are you still talking?