Popular Comedy Quotes
POLICE BRUTALITYYY! POLICE BRUTALITYYYYYY!Tracy Turnblad
Rene: What are you doing? You promised me breakfast.
Brodie: Breakfast, shmreakfast. Look at the score, for Christ's sake. It's only the second period and I'm up 12 to 2. Breakfasts come and go, Rene, but Hartford, "the Whale," they only beat Vancouver once, maybe twice in a lifetime.
Carter Duryea: [Carter and Alex meet in an elevator] 47. Are you going to Sports America offices?
Alex Foreman: Yeah.
Carter Duryea: You an intern or something?
Alex Foreman: Uh, no, my dad works there.
Carter Duryea: Oh.
Alex Foreman: Are you interning there?
Carter Duryea: No, I'm starting a job there today.
Alex Foreman: That's good. Congratulations.
Carter Duryea: Oh, thank you. I'm totally scared shitless. I have no idea what I'm doing. Don't tell anyone, okay?
Alex Foreman: Okay.
Bueller?... Bueller?... Bueller?Economics Teacher
Ed Rooney: I don't trust this kid any further than I can throw him.
Grace: Well, with your bad knee Ed, you shouldn't throw anybody... Its true.
Ed Rooney: What is so dangerous about a character like Ferris Bueller is he gives good kids bad ideas.
Ed Rooney: Last thing I need at this point in my career is fifteen hundred Ferris Bueller disciples running around these halls. He jeopardizes my ability to effectivley govern this student body.
Grace: Well, makes you look like an ass is what he does, Ed.
They using big words now. Sanctuary, congested... that means umm, ghetto.LeeJohn
Michael Newman: My schmeckel got bigger now that I'm older, just so you guys know that.
Trudy: It couldn't have gotten any smaller.
Ted: [Laughing] It looked like a litttle Tic Tac.
Michael Newman: Yeah, come, here, I'll freshen your breath.
Sarah Marshall: I need you to get hard, Pete.
Peter Bretter: I know what I'm supposed to do.
Random Guy: Hey Amanda.
Amanda Becket: Hey.
Random Guy: Remember that time we danced at the sock hop?
Amanda Becket: Yeah.
Random Guy: I just wanted you to know I had the hugest boner and I was just wondering if maybe you and I could get together and... work it out?
Norbit! Why you run like little bitch?Mr. Wong
Gunter: [about Johan] He then fled to America with his mother, a common Bavarian... what is word I'm looking for? WHORE!
Todd Wolfhouse: Gam Gam a whore? I think something must have been lost in the translation.
Gunter: HOOKER! PROSTITUTE! SLUT FOR MONEY!
Eight hundred leaf-tables and no chairs? You can't sell leaf-tables and no chairs. Chairs, you got a dinette set. No chairs, you got dick!Nathan Arizona Sr.