Panic. It crept up my spine like first rising vibes of an acid frenzy. There I was. Alone in Las Vegas, completely twisted on drugs, no cash, no story for the magazine, and on top of everything else, a gigantic god damned hotel bill to deal with. How would Horatio Alger handle this situation?

Raoul Duke

Any guy can sweep any girl off her feet, he just needs the right broom.

Hitch

Puffin: Hey Buddy wanna pick some snowberries?
Buddy: Not now Arctic Puffin!

Raoul Duke: I wouldn't dare go to sleep with you wandering around with a head full of acid, wanting to slice me up with that goddamn knife.
Dr. Gonzo: Who said anything about slicing you up, man? I just wanted to carve a little Z on your forehead.

Don't fuck with me now, man, I am Ahab.

Raoul Duke

I want to jump in front of every cab I see, because maybe then I'll stop thinking about her.

Albert

Santa: That's another thing... Buddy you should know that your father... he's on the naughty list.
Buddy: Nooooo!

Sara: So, you kinda like me, huh?
Hitch: No. I love you.

So how does it happen, great love? Nobody knows... but what I can tell you is that it happens in the blink of an eye. One moment you're enjoying your life, and the next you're wondering how you ever lived without them.

Hitch

Raoul Duke: Yeah. Hi there! My name... is, uh, Raoul Duke. I'm on the list, that's for sure. Here to cover the race. I have my attorney... with me, and I realize that his name is not on that list, but we must have that suite! What's the score here? What's next?
Frog-Eyed Woman: Your suite isn't ready yet. But someone was looking for you...

Know your dope fiend. You will not be able to see his eyes because of tea shades, but his knuckles will be white from inner tension and his pants will be crusted with semen from constantly jacking off when he can't find a rape victim.

Voice of Drug Film Narrator

What about santa's cookies? I suppose parents eat those too?

Buddy

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