Popular Comedy Quotes
Josh: We might get Marky Mark to plant a celebrity tree.
Cher: Oh how fabulous. Getting Marky Mark to take time from his busy pants dropping schedule to plant trees.
Cher: You can't be the absolute and final word on drivers' licenses.
Driving Instructor: Girlie, as far as you're concerned, I am the messiah of the DMV.
That's Ren and Stimpy. They're way existential.Cher
Cher: Ms. Stoger. That machine is just a lawsuit waiting to happen.
Miss Stoger: Thanks for the legal advice.
Sara: So, you kinda like me, huh?
Hitch: No. I love you.
Until mankind is peaceful enough not to have violence on the news, there's no point in taking it out of shows that need it for entertainment value.Cher
Albert: Honestly, I never knew I could feel like this. I'm going out of my mind. I want to throw myself off every building in New York. I see a cab and I want to dive in front of it because that way I'll stop thinking about her.
Hitch: You will just give it time.
Albert: That's just it. I don't want to I've waited my whole life to feel this miserable. If this is the only way I can stay connected with her then this is who I have to be.
Cher: Been shopping with Dr. Suess?
Dionne: Well at least I wouldn't skin a collie to make my back pack.
Cher: It's faux.
Come here, little one. Poppy wants to see you.Papa Elf
Christian said he'd call the next day, but in boy time that meant Thursday.Cher
He called me a baboon, he thinks I'm his wife.Al Czervik
I want to jump in front of every cab I see, because maybe then I'll stop thinking about her.Albert