Popular Comedy Quotes
Farva: Hey, let's pop some Viagras and issue tickets with raging, mega-huge boners.
Thorny: You know, Farva, only you can make a dark man blush. And no, we're not doing it.
Marissa: Just as long as you promise to take it easy.
Frank: What do you mean?
Marissa: You know exactly what I mean. You've come along way since Frank the Tank and we don't want him coming back do we?
Frank: Honey, Frank the Tank is not coming back, ok? That part of me is over. Water under the bridge. I promise.
He is Vigo! You are like the buzzing of flies to him!Janosz
[after learning he's been fired] Dan what the hell am I gonna tell my wife? I mean she already wears the pants, now she's gonna wear the tie and jacket too.Morty
GET OFF MY CASE MOTHERFUCKER!Brad Hamilton
Cartman: I bet him he couldn't do it. I bet him a hundred dollars.
Kyle: It's not your fault, Cartman.
Cartman: Dude, I know, I'm just fuckin' stoked I don't have to pay him.
Kyle: Oh, that's real nice! He was your friend, you fat fuck!
White Bitch: [holding crystal] Let's start things off with a bang, shall we?
Edward: But you'll kill millions.
White Bitch: Billions. Come on. Let me hear you say it.
Edward: My family will stop you!
White Bitch: WRONG!
Oh that's rich! I've got a cowboy on one side and an Indian on the other! It's like the wild west!Steve "Fink" Finklestein
Areola: But I don't need the class schedule. I only come to this country to be object of lust for poor nerds who cannot get American pussy.
Mr. Cornish: Well, isn't that wonderful?
Reporter: What do you call that collar?
Ringo: A collar.
Now where are we, dude? Oh. It's my house.Ted
William: I downloaded this little baby off the Net. I will know exactly how many spirits I may imbibe without affecting my judgment or my behavior.
X-Phile 2: You have every angle covered.
X-Phile 1: You know William, from this light, you somewhat resemble David Duchovny.