Popular Comedy Quotes
Brennan Huff: This house is a fucking prison!
Dale Doback: On Planet Bullshit!
Brennan Huff: In the galaxy of This Sucks Camel Dicks!
Elwood: This is definitely Lower Wacker Drive! If my estimations are correct, we should be very close to the Honorable Richard J. Daley Plaza!
Jake: That's where they got that Picasso.
We got a bleeder!Paramedic
Vicki Vallencourt: Well, Bobby Boucher, welcome to manhood. I'll make sure to welcome you properly later.
Bobby Boucher: Once again, I'm not quite sure what that means.
Turk Malloy: Are you in yet?
Virgil Malloy: I hate that question
Dozens of people spontaneously combust each year. It's just not really widely reported.David St. Hubbins
Everytime I see a bag of Hershey's Kisses my balls get so wet.Neil Patrick Harris
He helped Joshua fight the battle of Jericho, he helped Daniel get out the lion's den, he helped Gilligan get off the island.Rev. Brown
How about a Fresca?Judge Smails
MacGruber: Your companion is a very beautiful young woman.
Dieter Von Cunth: Thank you.
MacGruber: I hope you enjoy being date raped, ma'am.
Dieter Von Cunth: This is my daughter.
I spent like three hours doing shading the upper lip. It's probably the best drawing I've ever done.Napoleon Dynamite
Todd Flanders: I wish Homer was my father.
Ned Flanders: ...and I wish you didn't have the devil's curly hair.