Popular Comedy Quotes
Stephanie: [to Jack as she is beating him with her motorcycle helmet] I hope you die!
[stops beating Jack and looks at Miles]
Stephanie: You too!
Miles Raymond: Me?
Dusty Bottoms: What is it doing here?
Ned Nederlander: I think it's a male plane.
Dusty Bottoms: How can you tell?
Ned Nederlander: Didn't you notice its little balls?
You drive. You drive. I think there's something wrong with me.Dr. Gonzo
Lucky Day: Oh, great. You killed the invisible swordsman!
Ned Nederlander: [runs over to check] He's dead, all right.
Dusty Bottoms: How was I supposed to know where he was?
Lucky Day: You were supposed to fire up. *We* both fired *up*.
Lucky Day: It's like living with a six-year old.
I'm trying to get you laid, I'd appreciate a little help!Jack
Sew, very old one! Sew like the wind!Ned Nederlander
Well I'd like to continue to work for free, Mr. Flugleman.Dusty Bottoms
Dusty Bottoms: No, we will not die like dogs! We will fight like lions! Because we are...
Dusty Bottoms, Lucky Day, Ned Nederlander: The Three Amigos!
What we're talking about is money, real money, Amigo money. No dough, no show.Lucky Day
Do you have anything here besides Mexican food?Dusty Bottoms
He's on his final hole. He's about 455 yards away, he's gonna hit about a 2 iron I think.Carl Spackler
I want you, Evan Baxter, to build an ark.God