Popular Comedy Quotes
Lucky Day: Not so fast El Guapo! Or I'll pump you so full of lead you'll be using your dick for a pencil!
El Guapo: What do you mean?
Lucky Day: I don't know.
Jefe: I think he means that if you...
El Guapo: Shut up!
Dusty Bottoms: What is it doing here?
Ned Nederlander: I think it's a male plane.
Dusty Bottoms: How can you tell?
Ned Nederlander: Didn't you notice its little balls?
If the pigs were gathering in Vegas, I felt the drug culture should be represented as well. And there was a certain bent appeal in the notion of running a savage burn on one Las Vegas hotel, and then just wheeling across town and checking into another. Me and a thousand ranking cops from all over America. Why not? Move confidently into their midst.Raoul Duke
Lucky Day: Oh, great. You killed the invisible swordsman!
Ned Nederlander: [runs over to check] He's dead, all right.
Dusty Bottoms: How was I supposed to know where he was?
Lucky Day: You were supposed to fire up. *We* both fired *up*.
Lucky Day: It's like living with a six-year old.
Dusty Bottoms: Time for plan B. Plan A was to break into El Guapo's fortress.
Carmen: And that you have done, now what?
Dusty Bottoms: Well we really dont have a plan B. We didn't expect for the first plan to work. Sometimes you can overplan these things.
Sew, very old one! Sew like the wind!Ned Nederlander
When I came to, the general back-alley ambience of the suite was so rotten, so incredibly foul. How long had I been lying there? All these signs of violence. What had happened? There was evidence in this room of excessive consumption of almost every type of drug known to civilized man since 1544 AD. What kind of addict would need all these coconut husks and crushed honeydew rinds? Would the presence of junkies account for all these uneaten french fries? These puddles of glazed ketchup on the bureau? Maybe so. But then why all this booze? And these crude pornographic photos smeared with mustard that had dried to a hard yellow crust? These were not the hoofprints of your average God-fearing junky. It was too savage. Too aggressive.Raoul Duke
Dusty Bottoms: No, we will not die like dogs! We will fight like lions! Because we are...
Dusty Bottoms, Lucky Day, Ned Nederlander: The Three Amigos!
What we're talking about is money, real money, Amigo money. No dough, no show.Lucky Day
Do you have anything here besides Mexican food?Dusty Bottoms
Listen, honey. Let me call you right back. Miles and I are in the middle of something. No, it's nothing serious, Miles is just having one of his freak-outs. Yeah. Love you too.Jack
Dr. Gonzo: I have to go.
Raoul Duke: Go?
Dr. Gonzo: Yes. Leave the country. Tonight.
Raoul Duke: Calm down. You'll be straight in a few hours.
Dr. Gonzo: No. This is serious. One more hour in this town and I'll kill somebody!