Popular Comedy Quotes
The woods is no place for a bear!Boog
Ah, ah, ah! Nobody says the "B" word!Beetlejuice
See, it doesn't hurt anyone! Fuck, fuckety, fuck, fuck, fuck.Cartman
Matheson: You know you gonna die, right?
Matheson: I'm gonna kill the fuck out of you! I hope you enjoy these last seventeen minutes of your life.
Diego: Does it come with balloons?
Mark: What am I, a birthday clown? NO! It doesn't come with balloons. Suck it off the tap!
Walter: What do you want? Some money?
Buddy: No! I just wanted to meet you and thought maybe you might want to meet me.
Walter: Who wouldn't wanna meet you?
I'd like you to meet Sherri and Terri. Two girls utterly infatuated with men who have larger than normal... medulla oblongata's.Van Wilder
Pat Healy: What, you think yer shit don't stink?
Ted: No, I don't think, I mean, yes it does, no I don't...
Amelia Earhart: I take it you have a plan?
Larry Daley: I'm going to divide the house.
Joanna: How dare you judge me? Look at you. You're just some penny-stealing... criminal... man.
Peter Gibbons: Well that may be. But at least I never slept with Lumbergh.
Special Olympics Athlete: You're a faker.
Thomas: A mother-faker!
Steve Barker: Jeffy doesn't understand! Jeffy cocoa for cuckoo pops, uhh... Jeffy...
Special Olympics Athlete: Shut up you stupid a-s-s!
Jack Wyatt: [takes a drink of something Uncle Arthur has just made in the blender] This tastes awful!
Uncle Arthur: I know. I just like to blend.