Popular Comedy Quotes
Grace: I've never seen the moon that big.
Bruce: We really shouldn't waste it.
Let's hop on the good foot and do the bad thing.Austin
[to Max] She's in love with a dead guy anyway.Herman Blume
Missy: Oh my god, he just called Sissy 'Juggs'.
Chrissy: I'm on it.
[pulls out knife]
Jay: What's with the knife, we havin' cake or something?
Chrissy: Great, he's retarded to boot.
Jay: [to Silent Bob] Dude, she called you retarded.
Edward: A chocolate river! Mmm! Mmm! Chocolate! Hahahaha!
Willy: That's actually the sewer line.
Well, I have all your equipment in my locker. You should probably come get it cause I can't fit my numchucks in there anymore.Napoleon Dynamite
...'cause you people are BASTARD PEOPLE!Corky St. Clair
Bartleby Gaines: You said you didn't wanna be a part of this thing.
Sherman Schrader: I didn't want to have anything to do with it. I wanted to be the fourth generation of Schrader to go to Harmon. But then I realized, I would much rather be the first generation of Schrader to go to the South Harmon Institute of Technology. I said it, okay? I said it.
Bartleby Gaines: So you're saying... you're saying you want to be a S.H.I.T. head?
Sherman Schrader: I'm saying I wanna be a S.H.I.T. head. I wanna be a S.H.I.T. head.
Michael Newman: You've gotta show me how you do the quarter trick, it's driving me crazy!
Ted: A good magician never reveals his secrets... however, if you invite us over for dinner more often...
Michael Newman: You can come over tomorrow night and the next night and the next night and whenever you want!
I can't wait to sit around for 4 days and watch Gossip Girl.Daphne Binks
How many other animals are in on the conspiracy? God bless America! I hope the bald eagle hasn't turned!Shaw