Popular Comedy Quotes
Ulysses Everett McGill: Ain't you gonna introduce us, Pete?
Pete: I don't know their names. I seen 'em first!
Karen: I happen to LIKE the roller coaster, okay? As far as I'm concerned, your grandmother is brilliant.
Gil: Yeah if she's so brilliant why is she sitting in our NEIGHBOR'S CAR?
Trent: Baby, that was money! Tell me that wasn't money.
Mike: That was so demeaning.
Trent: She smiled, baby.
Mike: I can't believe what an asshole you are.
Trent: Did she, or did she not smile.
Mike: She was smiling at what an asshole you are.
Trent: She was smiling at how money I am, baby.
Droz: Ladies and gentlemen, I think it's time to revive an ancient tradition we seem to have long forgotten.
Cecilia: They confiscated the altar, Droz.
Droz: No, I'm not talking about human sacrifice, Ceel. I'm talking about something we used to do every Saturday night as a matter of principle. Here's a hint. Legions of hand-stamped meatheads... in coed naked lacrosse T-shirts... power-chugging watered-down Meisterchau... regurgitating on the glue-matted floors.
Mullaney: Kiln-like temperatures, fights with townies... lines of drunken people waiting for the bathroom.
Katy: Wait a second. You guys are talking about a party.
Droz: Ding-ding-ding. Gutter, tell her what's she's won.
Mr. Ray: Well, hello Nemo. Who's this?
Nemo: Exchange student.
Squirt: I'm from the EAC, dude.
Mr. Ray: Sweet!
Nemo, Squirt: Totally!
Dusty Bottoms: Time for plan B. Plan A was to break into El Guapo's fortress.
Carmen: And that you have done, now what?
Dusty Bottoms: Well we really dont have a plan B. We didn't expect for the first plan to work. Sometimes you can overplan these things.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: The day before the murder, you were seen hitting the victim and saying... what?
Ponton: 'I am going to kill you, I am going to kill you'
Look at this, okay? I want you to remember this face. This is the guy behind the guy behind the guy.Trent
Marin: We know this about me. I'm just not cut out for this kind of drama.
Erica Barry: I think it's the drama in life that makes you strong.
Marin: You always say things like that!
I'll drop kick you across the restaurant.Dan Foreman
Goonies never say die!Mikey
I was never a member of the Nazi Party! I only followed orders. I had nothing to do with the war! I didn't even know there was a war. We lived at the back, near Switzerland. All we heard was yodelling... yoodle le he hoo! Hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo, Yodelay, Yodelay, Yodelay-WHO ARE YOU!?!Franz Liebkind