Popular Comedy Quotes
Austin Powers: WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Basil Exposition: The shouting is a temporary side-effect of the unfreezing.
Austin Powers: Yes... I'm having difficulty controlling THE VOLUME OF MY VOICE.
I hereby demand the sum... OF ONE ... MILLION ... DOLLARS!Dr. Evil
Alotta Fagina: How dare you break wind before me.
Austin Powers: I'm sorry I didn't realize it was your turn.
Austin Powers: [holding Scott hostage] It seems the tables have turned again, Dr. Evil.
Dr. Evil: Not really. Kill the little bastard, see if I care.
Scott Evil: But dad, we just had a breakthrough in group.
Dr. Evil: I had the group LIQUIDATED, you little shit! They were insolent!
Dr. Evil: Son, wouldn't you like to see what daddy does for a living?
Scott Evil: Blow me.
Dr. Evil: What?
Scott Evil: Show me.
Austin Powers: Dr. Evil, do you really expect them to pay?
Dr. Evil: No, Mr. Powers. I expect them to die.
Dr. Evil: Okay, here's the plan. We get the warhead and then hold the world ransom for... 1 MILLION dollars!
Number Two: Sir, strictly speaking, a million dollars will not go very far these days. Virtucon alone makes over 9 billion dollars a year.
Dr. Evil: Really? Okay then... we hold the world ransom for one... hundred... BILLION dollars!!!
Oooh, Behave!Austin Powers
Therapist: We have some new-comers here today. Please say hello to Scott and his father Mr... Ev-ille?
Dr. Evil: Evil, Actually, Dr. Evil.
The Group: Hello, Scott. Hello, Dr. Evil.
Scott Evil: Hi, everybody.
Does that make you HORNY, baby?Austin Powers
Actually, my name is Austin Powers. Danger is my middle name.Austin Powers
Bird-Watching Woman: Over there. What sort of bird is that? Wait, it's not a woodpecker, it looks like someone's...
Army Sergeant: Privates. We have reports of an unidentified flying object. It has a long, smooth shaft, complete with...
Baseball Umpire: Two balls. [looking up from game] What is that. It looks just like an enormous...
Chinese Teacher: Wang. pay attention.
Wang: I was distracted by that giant flying...
Musician: What's that?
Willie: Well, that looks like a huge...
Radar Operator: Yes, sir?
Colonel: Get on the horn to British Intelligence and let them know about this.