Dr. Buddy Rydell: [throws a plate of eggs] I SAID OVER EASY! [calmly] Now why did I do that?
Dave Buznik: Because I refused to spoon with you last night?

I don't have much time, guys. I have to go home and wax Judith's legs.


Flight attendant: OH GOD! Ugh! I can't believe you fell for that crap! That's from 'Pretty In Pink!'
Janey: Are you sure?
Flight attendant: Trust me!
Jake: Excuse me, what are you doing?
Flight attendant: Let me give you a little piece of advice here, Jake. Why don't you lose the "I'm the cute and sensitive, popular boy with the big side-burns routine. It's just too pathetic! And for once tell Janey what's true in your heart. Stop being such a little bitch! And you Janey! Little miss other-side-of-the-tracks awkward rebel girl with the pseudo-intellectual glasses, why don't you wise-up to Jake's bullshit! Stop being such a dumbass!

Hey, you guys!


Oh, you are the loveliest girls that ever I set eyes on. Can you not get them married, Mrs. Dashwood?

Mrs Jennings

Hitchhiker: Hot damn. I never rode in a convertible before.
Raoul Duke: Is that right? Well... I guess you're about ready, then, aren't you?
Dr. Gonzo: We're your friends. We're not like the others, man, really.
Raoul Duke: No more of that talk or I'll put the fucking leeches on you, understand?
Dr. Gonzo: Heh heh heh...

A million girls would kill for this job.


Twilight, what did we talk about in class? Throw it through her, not at her.

Russell Gettis

[to Pintel and Ragetti] Guard the boat, mind the tide... don't touch my dirt.

Jack Sparrow

Maggie: That's too bad. I wanted you to try my chili. It's pretty hot.
Dudley Frank: No, I'll try it. I like your kind of hot. Chili, chili hot. Food hot. That's the hot I want to kiss.

Janine Melnitz: Do you believe in UFOs, astral projections, mental telepathy, ESP, clairvoyance, spirit photography, telekinetic movement, full trance mediums, the Loch Ness monster and the theory of Atlantis?
Winston Zeddemore: Ah, if there's a steady paycheck in it, I'll believe anything you say.

Marianne: Are we never to have a moment's peace? The rent here may be low but I believe we have it on very hard terms.
Elinor Dashwood: Mrs Jennings is a wealthy woman with a married daughter, she has nothing to do but marry off everyone else's.

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