Hello Sam Sparks, I'm America!

Sam Sparks

Hi peter, I saw your billboards, they're spectacular. I'm sorry for calling you a whore. Best of luck with Sydney, if you're not still together... you can Facebook me.

Doug

Harry Burns: There are two kinds of women: high maintenance and low maintenance.
Sally Albright: Which one am I?
Harry Burns: You're the worst kind. You're high maintenance but you think you're low maintenance.

I could go over to your mama's and light a small fire in her panties!

Drake

I couldn't believe that she knew my name. Some of my best friends didn't know my name.

Ted

I think I just came... didn't you feel it?

Mike Damone

I used to use this little gun when I was a prostitute.

Red

Tiffany: Hey!
Pat: What the fuck? I'm married!
Tiffany: So am I!
Pat: What the fuck are you doing, your husband's dead!
Tiffany: Where's your wife?
Pat: You're crazy!
Tiffany: I'm not the one who just got out of that hospital in Baltimore.
Pat: And I'm not the big slut!... I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I'm sorry.
Tiffany: I was a big slut, but I'm not any more. There's always going to be a part of me that's sloppy and dirty, but I like that. With all the other parts of myself. Can you say the same about yourself fucker? Can you forgive? Are you any good at that?

Old Farm Lady: If peeing in your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis.
Billy Madison: OOH. That is the grossest thing I've ever heard in my life. Let's Go.

If the pigs were gathering in Vegas, I felt the drug culture should be represented as well. And there was a certain bent appeal in the notion of running a savage burn on one Las Vegas hotel, and then just wheeling across town and checking into another. Me and a thousand ranking cops from all over America. Why not? Move confidently into their midst.

Raoul Duke

Jimi Hendrix deceased, drugs. Janis Joplin deceased, alcohol. Mama Cass deceased, ham sandwich.

Austin Powers

Josh: Look, I'm just curious. How many hours a day do you spend grooming yourself?
Cher: Some people are not lucky enough to be as naturally adorable as you are.
Josh: Stop it, you're making me blush.

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