Popular Comedy Quotes
Red: [after having his necklace snatched by Deebo] Hey, man, why didn't y'all help me!
Smokey: [slouching in his chair] Man, I'm high.
Red: Man, that's fucked up. If it was y'all, I would've helped y'all.
Craig Jones: What about the time he tried to choke me in Smoke's backyard?
Red: [pause, thinks about it] Oh, that was different.
You win some, you lose some. But you live, you live to fight another day.Mr. Jones
Ezal: Smoke, buy me a 40oz for my birthday.
Smokey: Today your birthday?
Ezal: What's today?
Craig Jones: Mom, loan me 200 dollars.
Mrs. Jones: Craig, I wouldn't feel comfortable lending you money without a job.
Craig Jones: If I had a job, I wouldn't need to borrow any money.
Mrs. Jones: Exactly.
Pastor Clever: [at Smokey] Excuse me brother, what we call drugs at the 74th Street Baptist Church we call the sin of sin sins.
Smokey: Well round here, between Normandie and Western, we call this here a little twenty twen twen...
Craig Jones: Right...
Pastor Clever: Give me a little for my cataracts.
Smokey: You didn't put in on this man.
I love the way this country smells. I'll never forget it. It's kind of spicy.Peter
Jack: Wouldn't it be great if we heard a train go by in the distance?
Francis: It'd probably be annoying.
Brendan: Why are your eyes so red?
Francis: Why is your head so bald?
Uncle Albert: With great power comes... ow!
Rick Riker: Try to breathe!
Uncle Albert: I can't. You're kneeling on my crotch!
There's a tiny person on that speck that needs my help!Horton
The Mayor of Who-ville: I have 96 daughters and 1 son.
Horton: [laughing] Whoa! Busy guy.
Horton: I meant what I said, and I said what I meant.
Morton: [sighs] An elephant's faithful one hundred percent.
Horton: That's my code, my motto.