Popular Comedy Quotes
Marlin: Dory, don't bounce on the tops! They will... not sting you. The tops don't sting you! That's it!
Dory: Two in a row. Beat that.
Marlin: Dory, listen to me. We're going to play a game.
Dory: A game?
Marlin: Yeah, a game.
Dory: I love games! Pick me!
Marlin: We're gonna race. First one out of the jellyfish wins.
Dory: Out, got it!
Marlin: Rules, rules! You can't touch the tentacles, only the tops...
Dory: Something about tentacles, got it.
Marlin: No, it's not something about them, it's all about them.
Dory: On your mark, get set, go!
Marlin: Wait, Dory!
You blow it tonight, girl, and it's keggers with kids all next year.Heather Chandler
Malik: What are you doing here?
Other black guy at party: What do you mean?
Malik: I am supposed to be the only black guy at this party.
Other black guy at party: Oh, damn. Shit.
Malik: I know, I know.
Other black guy at party, Malik: [Together] It's whack.
Harry: Nice set of hooters you got there!
Mary: I beg your pardon?
Harry: The owls! They're beautiful!
Randal Graves: You're in the bestiality business.
Sexy Stud: Hey. Fucko. We like to call it inter-species erotica.
Randal Graves: Intriguing.
Susan: I want to spend the night with you.
Josh: Do you mean sleep over?
Susan: Well... yeah.
Josh: Well, okay... but I get to be on top.
Oop... I almost forgot. I won't be able to make it fellas. Veronica and I trying this new fad called uh, jogging. I believe it's jogging or yogging. it might be a soft j. I'm not sure but apparently you just run for an extended period of time. It's supposed to be wild.Ron Burgundy
Becca Crane: Edward!
Team Edward: Edward? Where?
[sees Edward glittering in the sun]
Team Edward: Edward, we love you. You're the best.
Team Jacob: No, Jacob's the best!
[smacks Team Edward's face with a shovel]
I'm sorry that I blocked your cock...Officer Slater
Minstrel: [singing] Brave Sir Robin ran away...
Sir Robin: *No!*
Minstrel: [singing] bravely ran away away...
Sir Robin: *I didn't!*
Minstrel: [singing] When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled.
Sir Robin: *I never did!*
Minstrel: [singing] Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about, and valiantly, he chickened out.
Sir Robin: *Oh, you liars!*
Minstrel: [singing] Bravely taking to his feet, he beat a very brave retreat. A brave retreat by brave Sir Robin.
Danny Butterman: Point Break or Bad Boys II?
Nicholas Angel: Which one do you think I'll prefer?
Danny Butterman: No, I mean which one do you wanna watch first?
Ashley: You know how you told me that every night before you go to bed you'd pray that you'd get into Stanford?
Ashley: Well the other night I prayed for something too.
Ashley: I prayed... that you wouldn't get into Stanford.
Shaun: [astonished] Why?
Ashley: Well I didn't really think it was gonna work!