Popular Comedy Quotes
Jack Ryan: Are you serious? You really wanna box?
Nancy Hayes: If I win, you show me how to steal a car. If you win, I do whatever you want. Put em up!
Jack Ryan: You grow up on a marine base?
Nancy Hayes: Don't use the, "I've never hit a girl" excuse.
Jack Ryan: I've never hit a girl.
[Nancy hits him in the head]
Jack Ryan: Don't be hitting me in my head when I'm not looking. You just awakened a sleeping giant.
Nancy Hayes: That's probably my mother.
Jack Ryan: Is your mother hot?
Nancy Hayes: Ugh!
Jack Ryan: What? I just want to know if you two look like mother/daughter.
Nancy Hayes: Easy, Jack.
Wait, where's my happy ending?Jack Ryan
Jack Ryan: There's no beer in the fridge.
Nancy Hayes: Look in the cabinet.
Jack Ryan: In the cabinet? What are you, British?
Nancy Hayes: Frank something came here last night and told me if I didn't give him $1500 for the wallets, he'd go to the cops. He settled for $450.
Jack Ryan: You got robbed. He would have settled for $100.
Jack Ryan: 200 Grand is a lot different from a tv set.
Nancy Hayes: Yea... It's way lighter.
For a long time I've been walking down life's road with my two pals, Bad Luck and Bad Choices. Fortunately I'm a big believer in new beginnings, new friends, and running from my problems. So one day I decided to head for the island. Aloha, my name is Jack.Jack Ryan
Walter Crewes: Jack, was that you giggling?
Jack Ryan: Nope. Must have been Number 9.
Walter Crewes: Well, what are you doing sneaking around here?
Jack Ryan: I'm not sneaking around. No, I was just thinking. Sometimes when I'm thinking it looks like I'm sneaking.
Nancy Hayes: What a freak hole.
Jack Ryan: What?
Nancy Hayes: Jack, it's really depressing here. I'm depressed. I'm depressed.
Jack Ryan: That's one of the things I like about it is how depressing it is. It's like where dreams go to die.
Lou Harris: You wanna piss with me?
Jack Ryan: I don't even understand what you're saying. Do I wanna piss with you?
Nancy Hayes: Jack, what do you think will happen if that money reaches those thugs.
Jack Ryan: I don't know. They'll probably have a hell of a luau.
Nancy Hayes: I mean to Walter!
Jack Ryan: We'll probably get invited.
Nancy Hayes: I know it wasn't just about me. Was it?
Jack Ryan: No. Come on. Those paintings on the wall could fetch a pretty penny in the right circles.
Nancy Hayes: Jack, we don't know anybody in the right circles!
Jack Ryan: I know plenty of people in plenty of circles.