Popular Comedy Quotes
[driving stoned] People on 'ludes should not drive.Jeff Spicoli
Derek: So what do we do now?
Brennan Huff: We can hug?
Derek: Yeah you'd like that ya faggot!.... I'm sorry, I'm new to this.
The stress is killing me.Mikey Abromowitz
It's all happening!Polexia Aphrodisia
Kumar: Roldy! Roldy! dude, you gotta come quick. There is these two filthy pussies just aching to get boned by us!
Kumar: I mean... duh... that there are these two lovely young pussies who would like to have a chat with you and I.
[to Lynn in cafeteria] Can I have a hug?Steve Barker
Earl Bassett: What're you bringin' that vacuum cleaner, for?
Valentine McKee: I like this vacuum cleaner.
Earl Bassett: Y'never use it.
Valentine McKee: Well, it's good for parts.
Mary Katherine Gallagher: I think they get the point Grandma.
Grandma Gallagher: Wait, I've got two more. When I say tap, you tap, and when I say booga booga, you booga booga.
Maria Ganitisis: What's booga booga mean?
Grandma Gallagher: I don't know, but if I say it you better fuckin figure it out!
Excuse me. I think I had better be where other people are not.Charles
I like smart girls. That's why I married your mama. Well, that and I knocked her up.Mr. Cavendar
Let's just start at the bottom and work our way back up to the top!Kermit
Julian Mercer: Me too.
Erica Barry: If I were writing this, this is where I would write "an awkward moment."
Harry Sanborn: Honey, if you were writing this, I'd be dead!