Boon: It's not gonna be an orgy! It's a toga party.
Katy: Honestly, Boon, you're 21 years old. In six months you're going to graduate, and tomorrow night you're going to wrap yourself in a bed sheet and pour grain alcohol all over your head. It's cute, but I think I'll pass this time.
Boon: Want me to go alone?
Katy: Baby, I don't want you to go at all.
Boon: It's a fraternity party, I'm in the fraternity. How can I miss it?
Katy: I'll write you a note. I'll say you're too well to attend.

Chauffeur: So he says "My wife's a pain in the ass. She's always busting my friggin' agates. My daughter's married to a real loser bastard. And I got a rash so bad on my ass, I can't even sit down. But you know me. I can't complain."
The Dude: Fuckin' A, man. I got a rash, man.

Princess Fiona: [as ogre] Donkey, shh, shh. It's me... in this body.
Donkey: [gasps] Oh, my God, you ate the princess!

Jim that pan lid is see clear.


Piano Teacher: Not bad... Mr. Connors, you say this is your first lesson?
Phil: Yes, but my father was a piano MOVER, so...

Billy: Thomas, get me some water. My throat is parched.
Thomas: Do you want tap or Evian?
Billy: I don't know. Surprise me.

Miracle Max: Have fun stormin' da castle.
Valerie: Think it'll work?
Miracle Max: It would take a miracle.

[after being tortured by weed whacker] Who brings a weed wacker on a boat?

Drug Lord's First Hostage

Mr. Bialystock, I'm afraid you've mistaken me for someone with a spine.

Leo Bloom

Wayne: So, Coach, how's your parole coming?
Coach Norton: Not good. The victim's whiny family keeps complaining
J.D.: God! What is their PROBLEM?

Drink it! Drink it! Drink it!

Steve Stifler

So God is picking on you?


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