Oh ok, I'll just go fuck myself then.

Matthew

You sound like you're from London!

Surfing Instructor

I like her red hair. I wonder if the carpet matches her pubes.

Surfing Instructor

Look at my limo driver... I'm going to have sex with her! alright!

Aldous Snow

I mean, I've heard that women do fake orgasms, but I've never seen it... It really, deeply upset me.

Aldous Snow

Yeah, I had a girl cheat on me once, with both Liam Gallagher and Noel Gallagher.

Aldous Snow

Off to find the mythical clitoris!

Darald

Sarah Marshall: I hate your music.
Aldous Snow: Yeah well, I fucked the housekeeper the other day.

How you served five years under her, I don't know. You deserve a medal, or a holiday or at least a cuddle from somebody.

Aldous Snow

Peter Bretter: Is she coming this way?
Rachel Jansen: Yep.
Peter Bretter: I wish I wasn't wearing this fucking shirt.

Sarah Marshall: Do you want to put some clothes on!
Peter Bretter: Oh, would you like to pick out the outfit that you break up with me in!

If you don't have a drummer, then why do you have drums you fist-full of assholes?

Norah

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