Popular Comedy Quotes
Aaron: Let me get this straight: our dad was "bromantically" involved with a guy that could fit in his pocket, and you're mad because he's white?
He turned the gun sideways! That's a kill shot!Phil Foster
...And will you, for the love of God, put on a fucking shirt?Phil Foster
I'd do it again you know? Us, you, me the kids, all of it. I'd do it again. I'd choose you every time.Phil Foster
If we are going to pay this much for crab it better sing and dance and introduce us to the Little Mermaid!Claire Foster
You put *your* junk in reverse!Phil Foster
Now you get up there and work that pole like a Russian immigrant.Claire Foster
MacGruber: You're loco, man! Subtitles: "You're crazy, man!"
MacGruber: I just took an upper-decker in the master bathroom.
Vicki St. Elmo: Upper-decker?
MacGruber:Yeah, it's where you take a shit in the water tank and not the bowl... You look great.
MacGruber: "Don't worry we got your back. We're only 7 blocks away. So if anything goes down..."
Vicki St. Elmo: "7 blocks?"
MacGruber: "Okay, you got me. About 20 blocks."
Vicki St. Elmo: "Wasn't there anything closer?"
Lt. Dixon Piper: "There were tons of spots closer."
MacGruber: "Yeah, with meters!"
I'm gonna turn Washington DC into a pile of ash.Dieter Von Cunth