Popular Comedy Quotes
Look out, Mister Potato Head!Pee-wee
Trisha: Hi, is Napoleon there?
Napoleon Dynamite: Yes.
Trisha: Can I talk to him?
Napoleon Dynamite: You already are.
Saul: Sick! You threw up in my printer!
Dale Denton: I did.
Saul: You break it?
Dale Denton: I hope not.
Now I will kill you until you die from it!Saddam Hussein
Father Brian Finn: If I was to tell you that I loved you and I'd give it all away just to be with you, what would you say?
Woman in Bar: Good night, Paulie.
Father Brian Finn: Yep. That's about par for the evening.
The mind plays tricks on you. You play tricks back! It's like you're unraveling a big cable-knit sweater that someone keeps knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting...Pee-wee
Shrek: What're the flowers for?
Princess Fiona: Getting rid of Donkey.
Jack Sparrow: We are very much alike, you and I, I and you... us.
Elizabeth Swann: Oh. Except for a sense of honor and decency and a moral center. And personal hygiene.
Jack Sparrow: [Sniffs his armpit and looks back] Trifles.
I'm gettin' too fat for this s***.Larry
Gail: I hope you like shrimp cocktail, because I want you to be guests of honor at our wedding next week!
Beth: Well, I hope it's not jumbo shrimp, because I'm allergic to oxymorons!
I don't want you to be the guy in the PG-13 movie everyone's REALLY hoping makes it happen. I want you to be like the guy in the rated R movie, you know, the guy you're not sure whether or not you like yet. You're not sure where he's coming from. Okay? You're a bad man. You're a bad man, Mikey. You're a bad man, a bad man.Trent
Marianne: I was never so grateful in all my life as I am to Mrs. Jennings. Oh, Elinor, I shall see Willoughby and you will see Edward. Are you asleep?
Elinor Dashwood: With you in the room?
Marianne: I do not believe you act as calm as you look, Elinor. Not even you. Oh, I will never sleep tonight. And what were you and Miss Steel talking about so long?
Elinor Dashwood: Nothing of significance.