Brad Hamilton: Hey, you guys had shirts on when you came in here.
Jeff Spicoli: Well, something must have happened to them.

Mr. Hand: 'Mr. Hand, will I pass this class?' Gee, Mr. Spicoli, I don't know! You know what I'm going to do? I'm going to leave your words right up here for all my classes to enjoy, giving you full credit of course, Mr. Spicoli.
Jeff Spicoli: All right!

Kermit: Maybe you don't need the whole world to love you, you know? Maybe you just need one person.
Miss Piggy: Oh Kermie...

God, I hate those fuckin' kids

White Bitch

I don't know how to put this but I'm kind of a big deal.

Ron Burgundy

I have the talent, I have the drive.. (got hit by a car) I have to avoid whatever that was.


Did you ever see that "Twilight Zone" where the guy signed a contract and they cut out his tongue and put it in a jar and it wouldn't die, it just grew and pulsated and gave birth to baby tongues? Pretty cool, huh?

Garth Algar

Dr. Gonzo: Cows are gonna kill me. Bisexuals are gonna kill me. Let's get out of here, where's the elevator?
Raoul Duke: No, fuck! Don't go near the elevator man, that's just what they want us to do. Trap us in a steel box, take us down to the basement. Come here. Don't run, man. They'd like any excuse to shoot us.

Hey, wait a minute, there's no birthday party for me here!

Jeff Spicoli

Harry: I can't believe it.
Lloyd: Life is a fragile thing, Har. One minute you're chewin' on a burger, the next minute you're dead meat.
Harry: But he blamed me. You heard him. Those were his last words.
Lloyd: Not if you count the gurgling sound.

Put Neidermeyer on it. He's a sneaky little shit just like you.

Dean Vernon Wormer

Good morning, gentlemen, and welcome to another season of Indians baseball.

Rachel Phelps

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