Popular Comedy Quotes
Dr. Gonzo: Cows are gonna kill me. Bisexuals are gonna kill me. Let's get out of here, where's the elevator?
Raoul Duke: No, fuck! Don't go near the elevator man, that's just what they want us to do. Trap us in a steel box, take us down to the basement. Come here. Don't run, man. They'd like any excuse to shoot us.
Wayne Campbell: She's a babe.
Garth Algar: She's magically babelicious.
Wayne Campbell: She tested very high on the stroke-ability scale.
Is it like a thousand degrees here or is it just me? It's me.Carter Duryea
[to the Dragon] Why of course you're a girl dragon. You're just reeking of feminine beauty... hey, what's the matter wit you, you got somethin' in your eye?Donkey
Kat Stratford: You're looking at this from entirely the wrong perspective. We're making a statement.
Mandella: Oh goody, something new and different for us!
Here is the list of things to do while I'm away. Batteries need to be replaced. Toys in the bottom of the chest need to be rotated. Oh, and make sure everyone attends Mr. Spell's seminar on what to do if part of you is swallowed. Okay? Okay, good, okay.Woody
I don't hit women. I would never hit a woman, Chloe. I'd hit a woman who was trying to hit me with a bottle. That's different. That's self-defense, isn't it? Or a woman who could do karate. I would never hit a woman generally, Chloe.Ray
Crush: Okay. Squirt here will now give you a rundown of proper exiting technique.
Squirt: Good afternoon. We're gonna have a great jump today. Okay, first crank a hard cutback as you hit the wall. There's a screaming bottom curve, so watch out. Remember: rip it, roll it, and punch it.
Marlin: It's like he's trying to speak to me, I know it. Look, you're really cute, but I can't understand what you're saying. Say the first thing again.
Temper's the one thing you can't get rid of, by losing it.Dr. Buddy Rydell
Marty DiBergi: It's very pretty.
Nigel Tufnel: Yeah, I've been fooling around with it for a few months.
Marty DiBergi: It's a bit of a departure from what you normally play.
Nigel Tufnel: It's part of a trilogy, a musical trilogy I'm working on in D minor which is the saddest of all keys, I find. People weep instantly when they hear it, and I don't know why.
Marty DiBergi: It's very nice.
Nigel Tufnel: You know, just simple lines intertwining, you know, very much like - I'm really influenced by Mozart and Bach, and it's sort of in between those, really. It's like a Mach piece, really. It's sort of...
Marty DiBergi: What do you call this?
Nigel Tufnel: Well, this piece is called "Lick My Love Pump."
Foxxy Cleopatra: You have the right to remain sexy, sugar.
Austin Powers: Oh, I hope there's a search involved.
Thorny: You smell something, Rabbit?
Rabbit: *sniff sniff* ... Fear.