Popular Comedy Quotes
What's your name, Fruit Head?Grandpa Bud
Meet you in Malkovich in one hour.Maxine
Juno MacGuff: [yelling through the house] Uh, dad?
Mac MacGuff: Yeah?
Juno MacGuff: Either I just wet my pants... or...
Mac MacGuff: "Or"...?
Juno MacGuff: Or... THUNDERCATS ARE GO!
Dr. Gonzo: Hello? Hi Lucy, God bless. Yeah it's me. What? I dont know, I taught that bastard a lesson he'll never forget. What? No, not dead. But he won't be bothering anybody for a while. Yeah, I left him out there. I stomped him. I pulled all his teeth out.
Raoul Duke: I remember thinking 'Jesus, what a terrible thing to lay on someone with a head full of acid'.
Dr. Gonzo: But we have a problem. That bastard cashed a bad cheque downstairs and gave you as a reference. They'll be looking for both of you. Yeah I know. You can't judge a book by it's cover... some people are just basically rotten. Well the last thing in the world you want to do is call this hotel again. They'll trace the call and put you straight behind bars. Yeah I'm moving to the tropicana right away... when I get a room I'll let you know which one it is... I gotta get off. They probably have this phone tapped baby... Yeah I know it's horrible but it's all over now.
Sylvia: Any ideas when this wedding might happen? Grandparents do have a tendency to die.
Violet: Mom, they're all right there.
Sylvia: Well, for now...
I think he has a hot dog... with a bun!Milly
Son of a bitch! Anthony! Anthony! Bob's gone. He stole his car! He flew the coop while we were sleepin'!Dignan
I can say what I want - I still got Nazi bullets in my ass.Grandpa
Look - you should be happy for me. You don't know what he says to me in private. Maybe it is love - as much as it can be...Penny Lane
I'll see my lawyer about this as soon as he graduates from law school.Rufus T. Firefly
Put the frog down!Nadya
No, Farva, you are under arrest for being a complete and total fuckhead.Mac