Popular Comedy Quotes
[written on piece of paper showing it to Frank] Welcome to hell.Dwayne
Charlotte A. Cavatica: You're very kind.
Templeton: Don't go spreading it around.
They'll never catch me... because I'm fucking innocent.Dignan
You're goin' down. Chainsaw.Ash
Gill: All right, gang, we have less than 48 hours before Darla gets here. This tank will get plenty dirty in that time, but we have to help it along any way we can. Jacques.
Gill: No cleaning.
Jacques: I shall resist.
Gill: Everybody else, be as gross as possible. Think dirty thoughts. We're gonna make this tank so filthy the dentist will HAVE to clean it.
Dave: "You want one?"
Nick: "It's 8 o'clock in the morning."
Dave: "It's 18-year-old Scotch - you want a promotion, you gotta earn it."
Nick: (downs Scotch)
I didn't know that horse was a diabetic!Kenny
Viola De Lesseps: You have never spoken so well of him before
William Shakespeare: He was not dead before.
Raoul Duke: We were somewhere around Barstow, on the edge of the desert, when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like: I feel a bit lightheaded. Maybe you should drive.
Tommy: No offense, but if I showed a picture of your mom to some of my buddies at school, she'd definitely be "Boner of the Month."
Paul: I'm honored. Is there anything to do in this town besides eat?
Fanny: They're all exceedingly spoilt I find. Miss Margaret spends all her time up trees and under furniture and I've barely had a civil word from Marianne.
Edward Ferrars: My dear Fanny, they've just lost their father. Their lives will never be the same again.
Also, you'll find a pair of safety glasses and some earplugs under your seats. Please feel free to use them.Max Fischer