Popular Comedy Quotes
The kingdom of FAR FAR Away, Donkey? That's where we're going! FAR! FAR!... away.Shrek
I hate Mondays.Puss-in-Boots
Puss-in-Boots: Stop, ogre! I have misjudged you.
Shrek: Join the club. We got jackets.
Oh, Shrek. Don't worry. Things just seem bad because it's dark and rainy and Fiona's father hired a sleazy hitman to whack you.Donkey
Hey, boss. Let's shave him.Puss-in-Boots
[after drinking a beauty potion]
Donkey: I don't *feel* any different. Do I look any different?
Puss-in-Boots: You still look like an ass to me!
I'm a real boy!Pinocchio
Princess Fiona: You know, you are acting like a... a...
Shrek: Go on, say it.
Princess Fiona: Like an ogre!
Shrek: Well, whether your parents like it or not, I am an ogre!
[growls at the dog to shut it up]
Shrek: And guess what, princess? That's not about to change.
Princess Fiona: I've made changes for you, Shrek. Think about that.
Donkey: Real smooth, Shrek. "I'm an ogre! Arrr!"
It looks like we're up chocolate creek without a Popsicle stick!Gingerbread Man
Shrek: So, Fiona's father paid you to do this?
Puss-in-Boots: Oh, the rich king? SÃ.
Princess Fiona: Is that glitter on your lips?
Prince Charming: Yes, cherry flavored. Want a taste?
Donkey: Wat about my Miranda rights?You're supposed to say "You have the right to remain silent!". Nobody said I have the right to remain silent!
Shrek: Donkey, you HAVE the right to remain silent. What you lack, is the capacity.